I know I am doing this for me and nobody else. I'm not doing it to get compliments or validation from anybody. But it's still nice, dammit. And I'm still keeping score. Over the past few months I have gotten several comments from my office-mate, one from their spouse, one from another co-worker. Yesterday, a friend I haven't seen in months complimented me. Today, another co-worker said, "You're getting thinner, you must be working hard. Keep it up!" and that made me smile. My Beau compliments me all of the time. The other day when he was hugging me, he commented on how small my waist has gotten.
Comments from family? Zero. I had surgery in February. They have seen me once a month, on average, and I thought that people who saw you less would notice more. Again, I think they notice but they don't want to say anything. But even my mother, who claims to be so close to me (but really isn't)?
Ugh. I do need to get over this. I'm sick of my own whining.
mental exertion vs physical exertion
8 years ago
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You're smart and healthy to want to try to let this go, but while you are in the process of working on that skill, don't beat yourself up over it. Besides, it's a natural reaction to want validation from other people, so you have nature to work against!
ReplyDeleteYou really are doing terrific and you are still my hero. I want to be like you when I grow up. =)
Aw, you made me blush. Seriously! I appreciate it. It is hard work, and I have stopped seeking validation from them for other things in my life. But I guess appearance/weight is still stuck in there because my issues with it are all wrapped up in how it was treated when I was just a lil' fat girl. Sigh. Someday. I'm growing. I'm changing. I'll get there!
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